Picked up the July/August edition of Martha Stewart Living yesterday.  I haven’t flipped through one in a while…really it just does too spectacular a job of making me suffer from “someone is always doing it cooler”.   And Martha has become so freaking ubiquitous, everywhere from Home Depot to KMart.  But I had to do a late run to CVS and what the hell, I’ll get a couple of magazines to go with the pint of Häagen-Dazs Vanilla Swiss Almond I planned to sneak into the freezer and eat at midnight without sharing.

20130715-200310.jpgWell, anyway, Martha (or whoever works for her) came up trumps with a recipe for swiss chard slaw.  Between my garden and the CSA, I have chard and kale out the wazoo, and desperately need new ways to use them.  Martha’s recipe had torn toasted English muffins in it, as well as cantaloupe and a scallion dressing.  I didn’t follow it to the leetter, just took inspiration, mugged the garden, and improvised something similar for lunch today, which Jeeps and I ate with leftover grilled chicken.   It’s crunchy and delicious, and if you grow “Bright Lights” swiss chard, it’s a very pretty, colorful dish as well.

Dinner rolled around and Jeeps was putting salmon under the broiler.  “Can you make that slaw again?” he asked.  After the mugging there wasn’t much chard left, so I filled in with kale.  Just as good.  In fact it was too good:  I made just enough for me and Jeeps, went to set the table, and came back to the kitchen to find Panda eating it out of the bowl with her fingers.  “Hey, you’re not supposed to like that!” I cried.  “It’s kale!”

Damn kids…

Damn Swiss Chard Slaw


All measurements are completely eyeballed

  • 20130715-200251.jpg1 bunch swiss chard or kale or mix of both
  • 4-5 sprigs of parsley, chopped
  • 2-3 scallions, chopped
  • Juice of half a lime
  • 1 glug mayonnaise
  • 1 swirl of sesame oil
  • 1 splash of sesame seeds

Cut the stems off the chard and reserve.  Cut the leaves into chiffonade – pile a few leaves, roll them up like a cigar, cut across with your knife into ribbons and dump in the bowl.  Repeat.

Take the chard stems, cut into 2-3″ lengths, then carefully cut in half or thirds lengthwise to make matchsticks.  NOTE:  do not do this with kale stems.

Add rest of ingredients to bowl, combine and toss until well-coated.  Serve with something, pile it on toasted bread, or just eat out of the bowl.


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